A PKF post

Warning: This post is long and violent. As am i (tall and violent toward peeps [which are the things getting tortured in this]).

It started as an innocent cup of Hot Chocolate. I went to get the mix out of the pantry. My next action (pictureless), was to realize there was something in the vacinity that i hadn't known about. I pulled something out of the pantry:









Peeps!













I took them out of their SafetyContainer, courtesy of the Peep Savers, i'm sure. A. k. a. a ziplock bag.











Notice the middle one has an eye missing. It's seen (or not seen) battle before.












As you can see, i seperated them.













The first peep.













Here is Igor, my assistant. He hands me the toothpicks. He asked not to be in very many pictures.











I told him to tell where the others were or i'd poke him with that toothpick. He admitted to knowing, as his siblings did, but wouldn't tell.











Here is the damage he sustained.













This is an eye.













You can see my next actions clearly.













Peep number two.













I poked him on the top of the head.













Amazingly, the peep held on.













He fell. Poor thing didn't have hands with which to grab.












I stuck two toothpicks in and started to push. I'm starting to feel really mean. Is that a bad sign? Or a good one?













No interesting comment possible. Did you know that hippos kill more people each year than lions, elephants, leopards, buffaloes, and rhinos combined?










Ditto. Did you know that a group of turkeys is called a dule?












Ooh, look, a wound.













Oooh, look, another one.













I took him outside.













I let the cat sniff it in the hope that she would eat it (she's already eaten 'Roasted Garlic Triscuits').











She showed more interest in the camera.













I held it up to the Casval's nose. Notice she turns away. I suspect poisen.
















Ooooooh, peep.













Oooooooh, matches.













Ooooooooh, fire.













This one had enough brains to blow out the match. Wow, that sounded weird…












I tried a couple more times and he wasn't so lucky.












Nope.













Here is the third (and last) peep. She was a girl.













She got the Porcupine Treatment right away. I set her aside to think.












I moved to the back to second peep and decided to take a bite every time he refused to tell.











One bite…













…two bites…













…three bites…













Finally i decapitated him.













Poor porcupined peep…













This is what happened to the porcupined peep. It used to be sideways, but i was smart enough to turn it back. =D Poor poor porcupined peep… >=E (fangs)















Here is a picture of what happened to the rest of the near-dead peeps. They were stuck in a ziplock bag with viniger and baking soda.











With their dying voices they called to their cousins to hide.












Not very smart. That's how i found the cousins.













There they were. I think, when the noise died down, they came from their hiding place. They had two jellybeans left from their rations. I didn't know peeps ate jellybeans. Or anything, for that matter.









I set Igor to watch over them.













Several hours later, i found Igor on his back, empty, but for a single one-ended toothpick to hold a note in place.











I picked it up carefully, in case there were any beakprints.












Notice the note says 'HA HA HA' written sloppily because they don't have arms, hands, fingers, thumbs, or anything with which to grab. How they even wrote that is beyond me.










I bandaged Igor up, but he still isn't the same.













Since i had to let the paper sit for an entire day (to find some scientific thingie), i took two pictures of the clock. One then, one the next day.











Clock number two. Notice it's exactly twenty-four hours later.












Note: This is very late because i lost the camera, then i was almost done when the computer decided to delete the pictures and…*goes on for while with excuses* …